J Cosmo Newbery

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Where Mr J Cosmo Newbery becomes a Cypriot and a long line of misfortunes start to befall the Newbery household:

Dear J. Cosmo Newbery,

Infirtherance to you to my email of this morning, I wish to inform you that the Attorney has this morning completed the legal documentation with the PROBATE REGISTRY and will be submitting the documents to the bank for immediate remittance of the US$16million.

In addition to this, I have give my attorney Mr. Muktar Umar (ESQ) your banking details for submission to the Ecobank International operations Unit.

Also, know that it is likely our bank International operations Unit will call you for mere formalities before remittance.

I will call you tomorrow to brief you before our bank ECOBANK International calls you.

Thanks and remain bless in Christ.

Regards,Ariyo Jacob.

Dear My Ariyo,

I must apologise for a rather protected silence.

You would not believe what has been happening here!

Firstly a spider ran onto the windscreen of my wife's car while she was driving the other day. She panicked and swerved the car, mounting the footpath and knocking down a lady's letter-box. The lady ran out of the house waving an axe! She started hacking holes in my wife's car. My wife, fearing for her life ran from the car, into the path of a school bus. The bus swerved and hit the axe lady, killing her instantly. The bus caught fire and my wife helped get the children off the bus safely. She has been recommended for a bravery award. As there was a fire, the fire-brigade was called. While watching the fire brigade my wife tripped on one of their hoses and broke her ankle!

It has been a traumatic few days.

Perhaps I will have more luck with your venture!

I am not sure what the time is a la GMT, daylight savings tends to move it around. We are normally 10hrs ahead of GMT.

Yours sincerely,

Cosmo Newbery, CEO
Edible Grim

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