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Meanwhile, back at a different sort of chambers:


ATTN: SIR WILLBERFORCE,

YOUR MAIL OF TODAY WAS WELL RECIEVED. THE WHOLE CONTENTS WERE WELL UNDERSTOOD. (Excellent!)

LISTEN SIR WILLBERFORCE, YOU ARE NOT GOING TO APEAR IN THE HIGH COURT, RATHER I AM GOING TO DO THAT ON YOUR BEHALF AS YOUR ATTORNEY, WHO IS REPRESENTING YOU. (Oh, good.)

THE ONLY PROBLEM WE ARE ENCOUNERING HERE IS FINANCE. YOUR PARTNER MRS. DANLA CHILE SAID THAT SHE HAS NO MONEY WITH HER FOR THE AFFIDAVIT, AND I DONT HAVE ENOUGH WITH ME TO SETTLE THAT.

I WENT TO THE HIGH COURT TO FIND OUT HOW MUCH IT WILL TAKE TO DO THAT, AND THE GAVE TO ME THIS ESTIMATE.

(1) THE AFFIDAVIT FORMS WILL COST :$500 USD.
(2) THE COST OF THE TAX AND VAT TO THE GOVERNMENT IS:$800 USD.
(3)THE COST OF THE STAMP DUTY :$200 USD. THE WHOLE THING WILL COST US ABOUT THE TOTAL OF: ($1,500 USD.)

YOU ARE THEREFORE EXPECTED TO SEND THE SAID AMOUNT TO ME. THROUGH WESTERN UNION MONEY TRANSFER. (And from where did you get this expectation, my good man?)

UPON THE RECEIPT OF THE MONEY HERE I WILL MOVE IMMEDIATELY TO THE COURT FOR THE AFFIDAVIT. AS SOON AS THE CERTIFICATE OF THE AFFIDAVIT IS GIVEN TO ME, I WILL TAKE IT TO THE SECURITY COMPANY WHERE THE TRUNK IS KEPT AND THEY CHANGE THE NAME OF THE FORMER BENEFICIARY TO YOUR OWN NAME.

AND IMMEDIATELY THAT IS DONE, I WILL THEN TELL THEM THE DAY I WILL COME TO PICK THE TRUNK.

AS SOON AS I PICK THE TRUNK I WILL THEN LODGE IT INTO A DOMISCILIARY ACCOUNT, FOR ONWARD TRANSFER INTO YOUR NOMINATED BANK ACCOUNT WITHOUT FUTHER DELAY.

I AM LOOKING FOWARD TO HEAR FROM YOU SOONEST.

REGARDS.

BARRISTER LONGE KUDU.


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