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The friar couldn't sleep. Sister Innocence Personified slept cradled in his arms but he could not sleep. A million thoughts were racing through his head, making a racket that totally precluded any possibility of him sleeping.

The Abbot featured highly, as did Mr Blessing Justice, but neither came close to the effect of the young woman sleeping beside him.

Tomorrow they were going on a picnic. He would ask her to marry him. They would have to leave their orders but he could see no other way.

Unable to sleep, he decided to answer Mr Justice. He slid carefully from the bed, sat at the computer and wrote:


Dear Mr Justice,

Last Friday I took the Abbot's car to drive to town in order to transfer the money. Through an unfortunate altercation with an escaped pig, which I later learned went by the quite imposing name of Devine Applesauce Troughsnuffer Lardball III, the Abbot's car and I found ourselves in the chicken enclosure of the nearby convent.

The Abbot was less than thrilled with this and I have been obliged to spend a great deal of time in retrieving, repairing and refurbishing the car.

I was under the impression that you did not want me talking about this enterprise we have undertaken together and so I had no real answer when he indicated that he wanted me to return and restore his car. Am I correct in my interpretation of your position?? It may ease things if I could tell the Abbot about the money but he is very conservative and I suspect that he may not approve.

I do want this to succeed; we do need the money to extend the monastery. I can see myself getting a great deal of kudos for bring such wealth upon the coffers of the monastery. Is it wise for a friar to feel this way? Perhaps not, but I do.

I know that you must be very disappointed in me as I have promised to help you and have been woefully less than successful. But it has not been without trying. Surely you can see that?

I certainly would never set out to make you a liar.

There is no way I can get out of my duties tomorrow but I recommend that you set your expectations on me getting to the bank on Thursday.

Yours in Christ,

Friar August Tuck.

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I will be glad and rejoice in thy mercy: for thou hast considered
my trouble; thou hast known my soul in adversities.

- Psalms 31:7

He reread it, sent it and slipped back into bed. The sister nuzzled closely into him but sleep eluded him for some time.


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