Easter had been kind to Friar Tuck. The formality of the period permitted him to wear his hood without drawing too much comment and he scuttled from duty to duty with his hood pulled and his head bowed. He was reasonably happy with this arrangement although he had been staying away from the dining room and was consoling himself that this was good for his waist line. He was also reasonably happy that the strangely named Mr Justice had been quiet for a few days. Like all good things, it had to end. The following email awaited him when he arose on Easter Sunday morning:
Attn:Mr.Friar Augustus Tuck.
Easter greetings to you as well.
No no no my dear,what i am trying to let you know is that actually a good listener is good defender.You are very free to ask question but remember when you asked question you deserve an answer ok.Your two questions is highly honoured and i stand firm to inform you that i am in a better position to show you straightly the modalities needed to propel this transaction in perfect condition so that i will not be blame by Mrs.Mobutu for this is her life time opportunity.
'Obviously English is not his strong point' the friar muttered to himself. 'What on earth is a 'modality'?' He reread the paragraph and was still confused. He read on.
Yes,i continue to put you right that the handling charge's to lawyer will be directly to the lawyer at your expenditures while immediately after the procurement of the vital document's to ascertain you as the depositor of this fund in this bank i will perfect act immediately.
The friar grimmaced, stuck out a purplish tongue.
Listen Mr.Tuck,not that i am flying in fury or frenzy as you are saying but it is very embracing because i never expect such ok.I am not accusing you of trying to jeopardise my efforts,displeasing a widow,making me afraid,rather than delay is dangerous.Too much question's may spoil things alright.Telling you to free to ask question signify that i strongly believe that all that you are saying concerning being in a position in assisting to recieve this fund and keep it safe is truth.Meaning i never doubt you,why then should you be addressing me like that?.
'Like what?' said the listening Mr Tuck.
Did i do bad things to assist your church through this ways that the Lord is in full supervision.You should not feel puzzled ok.I know that you are very interested in this whole deal and that your church have much to do with the money,that is the reason and why i am saying that you should follow up with with regards to the arrangement's to see that we achieve our objective's.
By now the good Friar was totally confused and bewildered. He shook his head and mutter 'What on earth is this guy going on about?'. 'What guy's that?' said a voice behind him. The friar swung around to see Sister Innocence Personified standing there with plate of cheese and fruit. 'I haven't seen you at the dining room, I thought you might like these' she said. The friar nodded and tried to surreptitiously pull up his hood. 'That's very nice of you' he said 'Just let me finish reading this'.
'What guy's that?' said a voice behind him. The friar swung around to see Sister Innocence Personified standing there with plate of cheese and fruit. 'I haven't seen you at the dining room, I thought you might like these' she said. The friar nodded and tried to surreptitiously pull up his hood. 'That's very nice of you' he said 'Just let me finish reading this'.
NOTE:I want you to be strengthen in your interest skill and engender quick attention to this transaction.Just embark on my instruction's.I am aptly trying to put you clear and for you to hurry up. Kindly have it in mind that anything expenditure to the lawyer is directly from to him to him ok.Let us have a good work done by the lawyer first of all,then leave my side of the work.
Desire achieved Is joyful to the heart.
Not just the heart, thought the friar, glancing at the Sister.
Thanks and best regard's,
He closed the email and turned to the Sister, saying, 'Just a family email. From my mad Uncle. I'll answer it later.'
'Why is your mouth purple?' she asked.
'Why is your mouth purple?' she asked.