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But I write to the bank anyway. I take the opportunity to ask them about a small picture...

Mein Dear Frau Atuma,

I have your letter received and am understanding it most well.

Mein business associate and mentor, the honourable Mr Henry Greay, seems incommunicado to be found and his emails are to me unopened returned.

This in a quandary leaves me as he is mein path to the documents your require. Can you me assist? Are you Mr Greay knowing? Is he of his mother inordinately fond? Can you on his door be knocking to dispatch him to his emails?

Please advise me with haste so I may the transaction move forward rapidly.

While I have you with me, could you for me ein favour do? I would it appreciate most greatly. It is a most small thing.

I am a thesis researching and I would you opinion like. I have to this email a picture attached. I am asking you to be telling me what you see in the picture. It is a most simple test but mein thesis would be strengthened with the opinions of Nigerian intellectuals in the study included.

Thanking you most earnestly and your reply without patience awaiting,

Yours most sincerely,

Sigmund Freud (Dr).

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