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Rogan sets him straight:

My Goodly Mr Samuel,

I am wishing you the blessings of a sunny morning.

You are misunderstanding my predicament, Mr Samuel. It is not being that I am with difficulty with talking it is that I am totally not able to talk. My voice box is being gone. It is not being there at all after the Maharajah's surgeon cut it out. Am I being clear to you?

When I was being made a eunuch as a very small boy my father gave me to the Maharajah's aide and I was being taken away and they were cutting off my testicular manhood and cutting out my voice box. Why are you making me say this all again?

This is why I am wearing my beard as it is hiding my scars on my throat from view. So yes, I am telling you that I am still having a beard.

You will most easily recognise myself in Ghana as I wear a turban due to my close adherence to the Klothhed religion. It is being a dispensation from the Governmental bodies that I am permitted to be being photographed with it on my head at all. So yes Sir, Mr Samuel, I am most readily recognised.

My religion is a very strict on and is being based on the words and wisdom of the great swami, Skrugemacduk. It is being the basis of his teaching that gifts are a false sign of friendship and true friendship is being built on the warmth of the heart not the size of the Rolex. This is being why I am without comfort when you are talking about giving to me of gifts. As my friend I will be giving you a warm embrace and a most willing ear. That is all I ask from you in return. Are you understanding what I am saying?

I am wishing you well, my friend,

Rogan Josh.

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