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Dr Alex promises Princess Tikka that her suffering is over.
Dearest Princess Tikka Masala, (A bit forward Dr Alex!)
I received your email with thanks and all the compliments are well accepted. I see you are a good woman and I promise you all your suffering is over. I contacted our corresponding bank in South Africa on your behalf informing them to handle your file with genuniety I explained to them our relationship and they promised that as soon as everything is done that your payment will be in the first batch.
As soon as you receive the form carefully fill it and return back to the fax number given to you. Now I want to warn you now that anybody contacting you in respect of this payment, you should be carefull because there is no way this payment will get to your account without this office.
As soon as we are through, I will take a month leave from my office and visit your country. My wife sents her regards to you and promised to speak with you immediately you finish with your meditation.
Send my regards to your family.
I await your reply.
My Dear Alex,
I am being too forwardly calling you Alex? I am not knowing these things. I am being more an action woman than a socially butterfly.
If you can be easing my suffering I will be eternally graceful to you. I will be embracing you with hugs of gratitude. Whether I can be repaying you as you are so richly deserving is a pointed moot.
There have been appearing to date no documents for me to fax.
I look forward to greeting you and entertaining you as someone of my station surely must be doing for someone who has been giving of his generousness as you most kindly have been doing.
I am thinking it is a pity that you are with wife as there are things that I could be doing for your pleasure that would be expressing my gratitude in a manner most tangible. Actions are spoken much loudly instead of words and they are feeling more pleasantly too I warrant you. But words are good also. I am being so told.
My most serene greetings to your darling wife. I will be presenting to her an illuminating copy of our new testament, the Karma Sutra, so she may be doing for you what I cannot.
I am thanking you once more for your kindly help and understanding. May the blessings of the goddess Candida be upon your loins.
I am being most watchful for your fax.
Yours most serenely,