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With little left to loose I have written a newsy-rambly-sexy-suggestive sort of letter to young Kwame. If he responds well, then we will see what happens from there. If he doesn't I will bring Modesty back in to finish it all off. Fingers crossed!
Dear Dear Kwame,
Are you drunk? Your last letter was most confusing and worrying. Your words were all funny and the writing wasn't like the Kwame I know. Are you all right?
Have you been drinking? Don't get me wrong, I love a drink or two myself. Can I send you anything that would help? Oh, I feel so helpless here. I can sense that you are all confused and something is worrying you. I wish I could be there to hold you.
Yes of course I am interested in the transaction! I think you are very brave trying to do that and I am sure that I could pretend to be your American boss's wife - as long as I don't have to fake an American accent! I don't like faking anything Kwame. You will get no fake orgasms from me.
My day? My day was spent at a play park with my neighbour and her daughter (she's twelve, and it is school holidays) - it was a place called Luna Park and has lots of rides - ghost train, scenic railway, all sorts of things designed to make you realise what a silly idea it was to have breakfast. It is at the beach so we went for a walk along the seaside as well. All rugged up because it is winter here so hats and scarves and coats were the way to go. Then we had pizza for lunch. Then back for some more rides. I just watched.
You didn't have enough money to go to the club? What sort of club is it? Do you want me to send you some money? A little drinking money, perhaps? How long would it be before I come to Nigeria to pretend to be the wife? We could both go to the club. (Or is it just a men's club?) Wouldn't your friends look at us then! I would make you very proud to have me by your side. And I would make them very jealous!
Do I like big digs? I think you mean dicks. Well my experience is that it is not the size that really matters but what you do with it. Just because you have a sports car, it doesn't mean that you know how to drive it. On the other hand, if you have to start somewhere, big is not a bad place. Are you trying to tell me you are big or are you trying to make sure I will not be disappointed when I see your dick? I remember a joke about a man who went to the Doctor and he said he had a problem with his dick. The doctor said 'give me a look'. The guy said 'you must promise that you wont laugh!'. 'Of course I wont laugh, I'm a doctor. Drop your pants and show me.' The guy undid his pants and flopped out this dick about the size of a jelly bean (Do you know what a jelly bean is? A lolly, about 2cm long). The doctor couldn't help himself and roared with laughter. The guy said 'See, I told you you would laugh. It has been swollen up like this all week.' Anyway I don't want you to tell me about your dick. Actions speak so much louder than words, Kwame. Mind you if you want to tell me what you will do with it...I'd like that. Are you brave enough to tell me your fantasies? You talked about me touching and sucking your dick. Would you like that? They say if you have your tongue pierced you can suck dicks much better. Apparently the little ball thing rubs on the underside of the dick. Would you like me to get my tongue pierced before I come over?
I have never made love in a pool. I am not sure what a bath top is. But there is a first time for everything. Well, almost everything. I tried it in a spa once but it is not really comfortable and I got water everywhere.
You have an advantage over me. In your make believe stories, your fantasies, you can imagine me beside you, touching your dick, caressing it, teasing it, tickling it, running my fingernails down its firm, hot, erect length, sucking it slowly until you beg for me to finish you off...you can do that because you know what I look like. When I dream about you and me together I have to do it in the dark because I do not know what you look like. Are you going to send me a photo? Or did you lie to me?
Dear Kwame, I hope this letter makes you feel better. You sounded so sad in your last letter. I guess it brought out all my mothering instincts. I want to cuddle you and make you feel that the world is not full of rotten people.
Much love and distant hugs,
P.S. I am going to send my nude photo with this email. I know I said I would wait for your photo but I am starting to think that will never happen anyway and I think you need a little something to cheer you up. I want to be that little something.
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