The Lily Saga

I wrote the Age newspaper. Basically the same letter as I have used all along. It was published in the Letters to the Editor section. A local radio station picked up on it and rang me at work for an 'on-air' interview by Neil Mitchell. You will be relieved to know that I am going to spare you a transcript but the following was my follow-up letter to Mr Mitchell:

Dear Neil,

Someone, whose name eludes me, sad that everyone is famous once in their life. Well, today has certainly been something of an experience: what with the radio interview with you this morning and a phone interview by the Age for an article tomorrow, my stocks with the heirs-apparent have soared.

Their rooms are still a mess but I have gained a certain novelty value and am being shown off as a curiosity to their friends.

With regard to the answer to the question I feel I need to be very careful in conveying your listener's comments on to Richard; they mostly tend to favour the Biblical theory but I had a terrible vision when I was driving home today...

Me

Richard! I have the answer to your lily question!?

Richard

...youwot?

Me

Remember, Bob Hope in the 'Princess and the Pirate'? When the flower popped up? Well, it's from the Bible. "Consider the lilies of the field..." and all that. OK? That answers your question: it's a religious tradition; the the listeners on 3AW said so.

Richard

[Heaves deep six year old sigh] Oh, father! What are you going on about? Look, the lilies in the Bible (St Matthew 6:28, St Luke12:27 et al) have been conclusively identified as Anemone coronaria whereas the Arum lily is Zantedeschia aethiopica. Clearly a different crittur. Then, of course, if the lily was a recognised symbol of death why didn't that great artisan of symbols and imagery, William Shakespeare, associate the lily with death, eh? Tell me that, then? And really father, your own letter to the Archbishop of Melbourne got you nowhere, did it? If he doesn't think that there is a connection with the Bible, what are you doing meddling with it, eh? Now go away and don't bother me until you have the correct answer or I'll have you filleted and fed to some mutant rat. Cowabunga dude.

As I said, a terrible vision. Dandenong Road does that to me.

I am still awaiting replies from The Australian Lily Society, Bugs Bunny, HRH Prince Charles, Isaac Azimov, John Clease and a second try at Bob Hope. Once I have received these I shall hand them over to Richard and let him choose which one he likes best.

Yours on my one day of fame...

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